Did a powerful Portland pastry just change the flavor of the race to the Evergreen Premier League title?
The Oly Town Artesians are battling through their very first season in the EPLWA. As you might expect, it has been a campaign of ups and downs as the state capital side learn the ins and outs of the competition.
One of the previous highs for Oly Town was a 1-0 win over title contenders Bellingham United at Civic Stadium in Bellingham. The lowest of lows came recently when the Artesians fell 1-0 at Spokane Shadow, a club that has just that one win and has been outscored 33-5 this season. Another low came in Oly Town’s last match, a 6-1 drubbing at first place Seattle Stars.
So you can forgive Artesians General Manager Brandon Sparks for looking, even grasping for any possible momentum changer. When in Portland, how about a Voodoo Doughnut?
Not just any Voodoo Doughnut, though. An actual voodoo doll doughnut. Tasty, and with just a hint of black magic and mischievous hopefulness. You can almost imagine your soccer foe’s uniform in the frosting. It could be a late goal that acts as that pretzel striking through the heart of the dough.
As Sparks’ post on the club’s Facebook page later exclaimed, “It Worked!”
How else can one explain how the Artesians went into Ridgefield on Tuesday night and scored one of the more improbable results in league history? The same Artesians who hadn’t scored a goal from the run of play in several matches. The same Artesians who played the first 12 minutes of the match with their starting goalkeeper JJ Olson stuck on I-5 traffic — and yet did not surrender a goal (Midfielder / defender Kyle Wiese filled in.)
It’s not Huddersfield Town beating Chelsea at Stamford Bridge — but it’s close. Vancouver are the defending EPLWA champions, hadn’t lost at home all season, and were using their matches in hand to catch up and climb the table. This one got away from them.
All it took was a spooked-up donut, blind faith, and a properly placed pretzel stick or two. Oh yes—and some timely teamwork by the boys from the capital.